Do I believe the Bible is wrong?

Hi.

I wrote an article yesterday. I think I need to clarify something.

I believe God created the world.

I believe the Bible is 100%, completely correct.

I am nearly 100% certain my professor feels the same way.

What happened in the classroom that day was nothing more than our professor saying, “Hey, there’s a contradiction here. So these look like two separate accounts of creation.” This was something I’d never heard before, and it was hard not to immediately reject the idea of Genesis not being… what I thought it was.

But our professor continued: “Since the Bible wouldn’t contradict itself like that, let’s figure out why there are two separate accounts of creation.”

My intent of that post was to explore that idea that these accounts are busy conveying theological truths about God, and that maybe they shouldn’t be taken as 100% historic, scientific fact. But part of those theological truths are that “God created the world” and “God handmade humans”.

(I understand that the “firmament” issue can be partially explained by a guess that there was, originally, a firmament, and that it was removed during the Flood; it also seems likely that that was just how all those ancient cultures at the time understood the world, and that it would make more sense to them to say “God created the firmament, and it’s just creation, not a god, just like the sun and moon and stars” (because other cultures thought gods held up the sky). They’re two different views, but neither of them, in my mind, raise doubts as to the validity of the Bible.)

If I’m in the wrong in these views, then I’ll gladly accept more information. And if I miscommunicated in my previous post, I apologize. I was intrigued by the fact that I’d never really paid attention to the fact that the two accounts were, well, different. And I realized that I couldn’t quite treat Genesis 1 and 2 as – basically – a replacement for a history textbook like I’d done before. I’d never read the two chapters, together, critically.

But I’m grateful that I got the chance to do so. I know that there are plenty of people out there who do think that the Bible contradicts itself – but, from what I’ve seen, that happens only when people take verses and segments out of the context of the Bible itself, the culture of the time, the passages surrounding the verses. I might not ever learn how to argue against evolution, but I can and will learn how to correct that mindset, given half a chance.

Be a blessing, and be blessed!
Rachel

Genesis: Science or Theology?

I was stunned when my Old Testament Literature professor told us – a week into my first semester back at school – that the Book of Genesis (particularly the first eleven chapters) was not a historical account. I was floored when he showed us why: there are actually two different accounts of creation in the book of Genesis. And they contradict each other.

Wasn’t this a Christian college? Didn’t we start the class off in prayer? My professor didn’t seem like one of those crazies – he might be from New Zealand, but he seemed respectable, knowledgeable about the Bible and faith! Yet he was starting the class by telling us that God didn’t create the world – that the Bible contradicted itself – images of Luther’s 95 Theses flashed through my head, stapled to the classroom door instead of the church’s. You can’t do this!

I was so ready to go all Martin Luther on him, you don’t even know.

Fortunately, I’d been doing nothing more than making assumptions – assumptions which the next four lectures debunked.

I thought I’d read the first two chapters of Genesis, but somehow, years of Sunday School and sermons had led me to gloss over the fact that Genesis 1-2 contains two separate creation accounts. The first is the one we all know: God said “let there be light”, and there was light. Firmament, land, plants, sun, moon, stars, fish, birds, animals, humans. Nice and ordered list in seven days – a bit out of logical order, but it’s all good, right?

But then we get to Genesis 2, and we see “This is the account of the heavens and the earth when they were created, when the LORD God made the earth and the heavens.” Wait, didn’t we just see that in Genesis 1:1? And Genesis 2 is already talking about shrubs, how did the land get there? Speaking of which – Genesis 1 – it makes it sound like water was already there, and it never actually talks about God creating the planet itself, and okay, what the heck is a firmament?

I’ll admit, I was panicking a bit. I’d professed my Bible, my God, to be infallible. I’d been utterly confident that we people did not evolve from ancestral apes, yet here everything was being challenged. And our professor didn’t need to do anything more than ask us to actually look, read, ask questions. It wasn’t our professor who was challenging my faith; it was the Bible itself.

Thankfully, he didn’t leave us stranded. The Bible might not be an accurate, scientifically, historically correct account, he told us: then again, the ancient Hebrews weren’t interested in recording one of those. We need to keep in mind that our culture today is highly scientific and has been heading in this direction for many hundreds of years. Facts need to be given, empirical evidence shown; if you can’t prove it, you’ll lose it. Scientific studies creep their way into the mainstream. The most highly lauded jobs are ones in the engineering or sciences fields.

Things haven’t always been like that. (And that doesn’t make our cultural mindset any better, either, I’d like to point out!) Back in the ancient Israelites’ day, surrounding cultures thought the sun was a god, the moon was a god, the waters were gods, the animals were gods (or ruled by gods). To the Israelites and their culture, saying the sun was nothing more than an object that one God had placed in the sky was radical. To them, it was different to know that the sun would rise and set and the stars would continue to mark the seasons, always, until the end of the world. It had nothing to do with how often they worshiped or what their gods were feeling like on that particular day; it was simply how the world was.

They didn’t intend for their account of God’s creation of the world to impart knowledge about the date of world formation or to debunk evolution (which, by the way, didn’t crop up until about 200 years ago, very generally speaking). They couldn’t; they didn’t have the knowledge – nor, I think, the desire.

So why did they write Genesis? What was the point of it then, what’s the point of it today?

Well… even if it doesn’t say God created the planet, it does show without a doubt that God is powerful, and he was in control when the planet and the stars and the moon and all of that were being fleshed out. So that’s something. Both accounts see the formation of man as the most important thing, too, even if they’re out of order.

And even though God’s working with an earth already made in both accounts – it sounds like the earth wasn’t a great place to live. One was all covered in water and empty and the other was just a barren desert. And God turned them into good places to live – good places for people to live.

I have plenty of other things to pull out, but I’m starting to notice a pattern. I’m learning a lot about God from this.

God is powerful and in control of everything – that’s pretty different from the other cultures around the Israelites. That’s pretty significant. And mankind is the most important part of creation. I bet you could even say that creation was created for mankind. That all-powerful God thinks we’re something important; that sounds significant too. And – God created a good place to live in the middle of a chaotic world. That last one sounds pretty applicable to us today, actually…

I want to dive into both accounts in more detail at some point. But one thing I want to make clear: Genesis isn’t showing us historical fact so much as it’s showing us who, exactly, the God in the rest of this book is. And after having a month to mull over that idea, I have to say, I think that’s a bit more important than precise scientific detail. Science is important – don’t get me wrong – but… we’re talking about the God of the universe here. If the story about Him and His chosen people and His plan of salvation doesn’t start off the book by talking about Him, I think we’d have issues.

There’s one other thing I learned from this incident, and it’s this: We are never done learning about our faith. No matter how much we might know about the Bible, about creation, about God, there is always more to learn. And that isn’t a bad thing. Expanding our knowledge of God grows our faith in leaps and bounds, helps equip us with truth and confidence.

But it requires us to step out of our comfort zone, put some of the beliefs we grew up with aside. (I caution you to be certain of the validity of the beliefs you take on; don’t be afraid to ask questions and challenge everything you hear!) I felt like I was betraying my faith, somehow, by letting go of Genesis 1 and 2 as a purely scientific account; I could hear every recent conversation I’d had with someone on the subject ringing in my ears, reminding me that I’d be going back on what I’d so confidently thought was true. But growth is hard and painful and, at times, unpleasant. That doesn’t make it bad or wrong. And slowly – eventually – with the Spirit’s help – understanding has grown in ways I didn’t dream imaginable. Instead of simply losing an argument, of defense for the Bible, I’d gained ten more.

I encourage all of you to challenge yourselves today, to step out of the comfort zones of your faith. Pray and seek somewhere you’ve always stagnated. Push for renewal. I promise you, the benefits far outweigh the risks.

Be a blessing and be blessed!

Edit: Just in case I didn’t make it clear, I do still believe the Bible to be inerrant, and my professor takes the same stance. The only thing that ended up being challenged was the way those chapters were viewed, contextually.

Beautiful, No Filter

Such an awesome idea!! Pass it around, ladies! #beautifulnofilter

Taken the second time hubby and I met ❤

Diamonds in the Rough

There’s a girl I’ve known for a good two or three years now. We’re ‘net friends – as the gamers say, we haven’t met “irl” (in real life). But there are certain things that can’t be faked for such an extended length of time. Eventually, e-buddies or not, if you spend enough genuine time around someone (provided they’re not phenomenal liars), you’ll get to know them. Perhaps not their mannerisms: how cleanly they keep themselves, if they’re prone to being more impulsive face-to-face. But from my experience, and if you pay attention, their core personality and their moral values tend to stay the same, whether you’re over the internet or face to face.

This particular friend of mine is a very high-minded person. When we first met, I thought she was rather emotional, even if I could (begrudgingly at the time) respect someone so outspoken.

As time passed, I came to appreciate her loyalty. As we spoke about more personal things, I was surprised by her passion for helping others – extending so far as to attempt to put herself through medical school to become an ER doctor, simply so that she could anonymously save lives. More recently, I’ve realized that this woman who so constantly belittles herself is both very self-motivated and academically excellent.

As our conversation turned to Christianity, something she hasn’t pursued since she was in her early teens, I was floored by her knowledge of Bible verses. This last week or two she’s texted me different verses around the concept of loving others as Christ has loved us. It’s all from the top of her head, as far as I can tell. I’ve been thrilled to find another friend to share this with.

The phrase diamond in the rough has struck me so, so many times lately when it comes to her, though. Here’s this girl who, from what I’ve seen and understand, most people steer clear of. She’s brash, outspoken – stuck in a small-time job and going to a community college.

But years of friendship have let me see glimpses of something more: a true friend, dedicated to the betterment of humanity, trying to show God’s love instead of shoving the Bible at people, intelligent, witty, willing to take criticism for the sake of making herself better.

I can’t help but wonder if that is almost like how God sees us. Not in the specifics, of course; everyone is different, and their good qualities shine through in different ways. For example, I would not call my husband charitable as my friend is, but he is steadfast and resolute in a way I have not seen from anyone else yet. While he is slow to make decisions, once he makes them, he will stick with them until the end of time – frustrating in its own right, but profoundly reassuring when it comes to our marriage (and, perhaps, to faith, should he come to Christ).

No – I wonder if God sees us all as diamonds in the rough. After all, He created us in His own image. We are all made with our own strengths and purposes – the Body of Christ must have different members.

But sin and this world casts what God created into imperfection. We are not as we were created to be; that is the entire point of Christ coming to earth. We were not made to suffer, to feel pain, to die – that came as part of the curse of Man’s fall and separation from God. But we do. We have become ‘in the rough’. Our brilliance has become imperfect, dim, covered in the dirt and grime of this world.

A long time ago, I was talking to someone about how God intended us to be perfect, and that in Heaven, we would be. Their reply was something along the lines of “I don’t want to be perfect, though. That’s completely boring – I wouldn’t be myself. I’d rather be in Hell and remain true to myself.” At the time I was so flabbergasted that I had no idea what to say – and I wasn’t sure if anything I could say would be true.

I believe, at the time, I had an inkling to the fact that we would still be ourselves in Heaven. Over time, and in the back of my head, my response to that has evolved.

Just like a diamond in the rough, we’re not perfect. We’re a diamond, all right – but misshapen, covered in grime, uncut, unable to shine properly. And in a way, I cannot blame the person I was talking to for thinking the way they were; I’ve thought similar, myself. I am myself, faults, grime, and all; I’m imperfect, and making me perfect is going to take away all of my imperfections, make me something I’m not; turn me into one of those church-going snobs or some dull, drab adult who doesn’t know how to laugh at a good joke or run amok in the rain.

And perhaps, in a way, it’s true. If a diamond is cleaned and cut and polished, it’s losing a lot of itself. It will no longer look as it did – except, perhaps, to someone who knew what they were doing, maybe only to the crafter himself. But I raise you a question: isn’t it the same diamond? To which the reply would most likely be “Yes… and no.”

In the end, it is the same substance – cut of the same material. However, it does not look the same, and is missing a lot of it.

So another question: Isn’t the cut and crafted diamond, well, better? When it is cut and cleaned, you can use it. If not for jewelry, then for saws or drills, or even just to admire when the sun hits it just right and it explodes into color. A diamond in the rough might be pretty, might be a diamond – but not until it is crafted can it truly shine.

I like to think of us in the same way. We are all made in God’s image – but so submerged in dirt and grown in the wrong direction that we’re really rather helpless. It takes a true craftsman to look at an uncut diamond and figure out where, precisely, it must be struck (and, I imagine, this process is different for any diamond due to fault lines and so forth), what must be cut off, how best to polish it.

It is a painful process. And the diamond cannot cut and clean itself, no matter how hard it tries – neither can we. We must go to our Crafter and let Him do the work for us; all He asks is that we be willing to be changed to what He knows will be best.

But, in the same way, when we come out of the process, when we are in Heaven, when we are finished and complete, it is only then that our true nature shines. Clean of the muck of this world (which we would gladly hang on to), we will become who we truly are. Not some mindless automation. We are still made of the same stuff.

It’s simply that we’ll be even better – and made perfectly to refract the Light of this world, to make it even more beautiful.

Our God of Second Chances

Not again! Agh!!

Today’s car struggle might not have been as dramatic as the last, but it was entirely my fault. No one was hurt (except my pride) and the car will be recoverable (even if I’m going to have to fess up to the family member we borrowed it from) and I can’t even claim people were rough with me for the mistake (even Hubby was surprisingly gentle when I told him!). 

When the family member loaned the car to us, he told us that one of the tires had a slow leak, and that would need to be filled up periodically. I knew that and even learned how to work the portable air compressor he gave us with the car. 

However, leaky tires were the last thing on my mind this morning. I woke up about an hour early for church – as always, intending to get some Bible reading in – and as always, getting distracted by Facebook, emails, Youtube… anything and everything but God. Suddenly it was 9, and I needed to rush to get ready.

The clanging, rattling sound the car was making was written off as something weird but workable. Same with how it kept pulling to the right. (I guess we’ve had such poor experience with cars so far that I’ll roll with just about anything – at least, that’s what I’m telling myself!) It wasn’t until I saw smoke coming from the front right of the car that I decided it was time to pull over at the nearest gas station.

I was treated with this lovely sight:

 

I got advice from quite a few people while I was trying to figure out what to do, since Hubby was at church with his phone silenced, and I didn’t have the number for the person we’d borrowed it from. I took the advice of the fellow working at the gas station and left the car there for a mechanic to check out tomorrow morning, with the car keys and my phone number. 

But now I’m home with the cat, waiting for a church friend who offered to drive me in to work. Hubby has been called, mom has been told, and now it’s just me… me and God. 

Rejoice. Hope. Persevere. Dwell on what is good. Do not worry. All of these commands are here in my head. God has blessed us and blessed us. One mistake does not change the fact that I am still His child. The what-if’s and self-blame are from our adversary, not from our Father. 

But how do I rejoice, when I’m so humiliated about my blunder with the car? What about so guilty about the fact that I’d ignored Him this morning?

I fired up the computer as I was texting mom. I stared at my travel bible and wondered where I should read, wondered what I should write about for a post (since I was feeling guilty about not writing last night). I decided to watch a sermon from mom’s church instead – partially for inspiration, partially some way to make up for my missed time with God this morning. And as I was watching, I realized something important.

I was getting a second chance at starting my day off right. 

What a mercy that is! That realization really shook me up, completely re-framed what had happened. I paused that sermon and immediately went to the Lord in prayer.

For the first time today I felt peace. Not that I “made up” for my mistakes by getting in some God time, but because I am forgiven, entirely. The hymn ‘Great is Thy Faithfulness’ has been on my mind all morning, and now I have the verse in Lamentations open next to me –

Because of the Lord’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;
Therefore I will wait for him.” -Lamentations 3:22-24

I have hope this morning: that no matter what happens, I can and will rejoice – because He has given me great joy! He will always, always forgive, so long as we seek Him. He will be with me as we get the next bit of this car drama sorted out.

And none of my mistakes hold a candle to His great love for me.

Praying that all of you have a blessed morning, my friends!
Rachel

Busy busy busy!

And I thought Monday was busy.

I guess I owe a bit of an explanation for the delay in posts after doing so many in a row. Long story short, I work about 50 hours a week (barring days off due to unforeseen circumstances – for example, a car crash 😛 ) and am working on eliminating my days off. 

This is just for the summer, though. I’m setting up to go to school in the fall. While I am new to the campus, I’m bringing in enough credits from my attempt at getting a Chemical Engineering degree over in Ohio that I’m technically a sophomore… it’s a bit odd, but I’m told transfer students usually end up with odd circumstances like that.

Soooo! Wednesday, I worked (only 7 1/2 hours, a short day), and Thursday, hubby and I worked for two hours before heading over to Nyack for my “freshman” orientation. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the school, our orientation, along with the basic college orientation layout, also contained a lot of prayer, a lot of talk of dress codes and curfews – and, of course, beautiful views like this:

(My phone was dying, so this image is borrowed, http://nyackrotary.org/wp-kr77za7/uploads/officer-induction-20120613-01.jpg)

It’s one of the top ten best views from a college campus in the country. All that hiking was worth it!

I ended up switching my major from a combined religion/psychology to straight psychology, with a Bible minor and a possible music minor (I played the flute for a good 10 years in grade school and really miss it). Lots of talks with my counselor and the dean of the school of music ensued. 

We got home around 5 or 6 PM from that, but hubby and I were in the middle of a fight, so getting that sorted out took a while – and, of course, my legs weren’t too happy about being put through that much work so soon after the crash. We both passed out pretty early.

Friday was an 11 1/2 hour work day, since I do both jobs – and then afterwards, one of the ladies from my church offered to take me to their monthly craft night to help out with VBS t-shirt making. I think she took pity on me when she heard that hubby was heading to Ohio Friday afternoon to pick up our new car and that I’d be alone…

…yes, you heard that right, new car!

My mom and stepdad took it upon themselves to hit up their favorite mechanic on Tuesday to see what he had for sale. Mom kind of sprang it on me (something I do not take kindly to) and, since hubby and I don’t have much money to spare, the car would be pretty much a gift. I was not a happy camper that night!! Ms. Rachel over here does not like expensive gifts.

It took gentle coaxing from numerous people for me to realize that, in the end, the car was a gift to ensure hubby and I were getting where we needed to go safely. My boss was kind enough to forward pay me for the month, so we could afford to give mom a bit of a downpayment. 

I promise I’ll get a Bible-study-type post out tonight and maybe a few pre-planned for the rest of the week. I’m writing from work right now – but can’t be doing that for long – it’s packing week for my boss’s subscription box business, so every minute I’m not working the store itself, I need to be doing that! 

The biggest thing, though, I can say for these last few days… I can’t do any of this by myself! Exhausted and frazzled as I am, I’d be too worried about the future to function if it weren’t for the fact that I know that God has been faithfully providing for our needs these last few days and will SURELY continue to do so!

“The LORD is my strength and my song,
and he has become my salvation;
this is my God, and I will praise him,
my father’s God, and I will exalt him.” -Exodus 15:2

Rumination

I have to say, I’m glad I put up last night’s post when I did. I’m not sure I would have if I’d gone through the rest of last night’s events.

Easy rejoicing was cut off rather abruptly when I realized I might very well have lost a friend over an unintentional, but serious, mistake. If it had been a question of my faith, perhaps it would have been a bit easier to deal with, but as it stands, the error was in misrepresentation – not an offense on faith grounds, but an insult to another.

But at the end of a night with little sleep, I have to wonder if I’m still being pushed to learn – learn to accept.

Hubby held me for a long time while I cried last night. One of the things he told me, quite simply, was that I had done everything I could to rectify the situation with my friend. At this point, the metaphorical ball is out of my hands and in my friend’s – in God’s.

But that’s so hard to accept! I hate leaving an argument unresolved, just like I hate the shame that comes from this kind of a mistake. I want there to be a fix, an elegant solution, a way my friend and I can come out of this a bit bruised but closer because of it.

I think back on the post I wrote about Job (removed while I edit) and that Philippians verse: “Rejoice in the Lord always; again I say, rejoice!”

I think on the fact that I know the Lord will forgive even this sin. On the fact that He will work all to good for those that love Him.

I’m still trying to understand it, still trying to understand how to praise Him now. “You are the great God of the universe, loving and faithful, and you are good, Lord… but back to the issue at hand, where did I go wrong and how do I fix it?”

It almost reminds me of the struggles I have with accepting gifts larger than I deem appropriate. It reaches a point where I’m no longer grateful, for the gifts are always freely given, but wrapped up in worry and panic over how much it had cost the other person, to the point where I’m no longer thinking clearly in the slightest. And by that I mean minor panic attacks, crying, etc. (If anyone thinks this is an admirable flaw to have, I ask them to get in touch with me personally so I can correct them!)

In both cases – both with my friend and in a recent example of this “accepting gifts problem” – that word accept has cropped up an uncomfortable amount of times.

How much am I fighting for control in these situations that I have little to none over? To accept the desires of others towards me, no matter how I feel about them – or to accept situations themselves, once I’ve reached the point where I, again, have no control… oh, God, how much do I do this to You without realizing it? How much do I try to play God in my own life, refusing to submit to the fact that You already have it in hand?

Does anyone know a passage (or two, or five, or twenty) I can read that pertains to this? I’m being drawn to the Psalms, but that’s a long book.

Going to get some more sleep before work. God bless, everyone.

 

Edit, three hours later.

I’ve brought this issue before a lot of people. Two Christian friends, my husband (while not saved, has been hearing me talk about God – he’s also my proofreader, and he has a good concept on some of these values) and, in the last three hours, my mom and aunt. And all have unanimously said the same thing.

Keep the post in question up.

Mom and my aunt have both termed it spiritual warfare. And I know fully well that making sure those around me are happy can be a huge area of compromise for me – being offensive is not something I’m familiar with.

So much of the New Testament is filled with encouragement to surround yourself with other believers for support, and this incident has been a clear picture as to why. My aunt is walking me through the reasoning now: that while it’s right not to want to alienate my friend, it’s my friend doing the alienating right now. And I shouldn’t be assuming that he’s ready for the Lord yet! This might only be the first step for him.

Instead, those of you reading – I’m asking for prayer for that friend, that he finds peace and understanding and guidance from the Lord, wherever it leads him. That whoever is placed in his life, that they lead him to our true God! Let’s be prayer warriors today. Amen?

Unlikely Prayers

I don’t know if this is exactly a “correct” thing to do, but I want to show you guys a screenshot I took of this blog’s stats not long ago.

That first bar is this blog’s first official post; the second is my second (the car crash post), the third is the one about God letting it happen. Almost two hundred views accumulated over two days.

I’m not sure if any of you realize just how flooring this is to me.

I work as a kind-of blogger for a small subscription box company. I help the manager maintain their Facebook page, as well. Keep in mind, I’m not a professional – what I’ve learned, I’ve picked up from her and from various websites over the past few months. We’d love these kinds of stats on the blog, and it’s been there for over a year. This is the average number of Facebook post views we’d get – about 120 – per post – when we have over 700 people subscribed to our page.

The reach on these two posts is bigger than I thought I’d ever get two months into this blog. And it gets better.

I’ve been reading a lot – and I mean a lot – more of the Bible in the last month or two, than I have in my life before this point. One of the things that I kept coming back to was how bold the early saints of the Church were. I admired Stephen, Peter, Paul. (Paul’s my homeboy.) If I wasn’t aspiring to be like Jesus, I prayed for that kind of confidence in my faith those early saints had. In the book of Revelation, when the fifth seal is opened, all the martyrs cry out for vengeance; they’re “given a white robe and told to rest a little longer, until the number of their fellow servants and their brothers should be complete, who were to be killed as they themselves had been.” (6:11)

A week ago, I was laying in bed after having watched a movie about Paul and listening to a podcast covering Revelation and thinking, “I really want to be one of those martyrs. I’d love that. That way I’d know for certain that I was doing this whole faith thing right, that I was speaking out.”

Yet little me kept hitting walls, staring down the music choice in one of my stores and being too nervous to switch it to a Christian station (even though I highly doubt the manager would mind) and being too shy to so much as open my mouth to customers about anything other than the weather and sales.

And here I am now.

What I’d been too nervous to do before the crash, poured out of me in written form. What I thought would be a simple subject to write about, a whim, put up just so I’d be consistent about posting, became a story that spread to people I’ve not so much as met before in my life.

I don’t want to over exaggerate the impact of two measly posts, or one single, non-injury-inducing car crash, but – they’ve sparked conversations about faith with at least three people, two of which I haven’t yet been able to witness to (but now have). Another friend has finally come to Christ, the culmination of a long struggle and gentle pushes from others. My manager put something up on our store’s Facebook page, and a lot of people whom I’ve met only briefly poured out well-wishes; one of them ended up getting in touch to ask how I was. For now, at least, that shyness has all but evaporated. The Lord saved me; the Lord keeps me well.

Back in April, when the Lord finally called me back to Him, I remember praying, every single day, every time I remembered: “Please, Lord. Keep me consistent. Keep this real. Don’t let this be a false start; give me perseverance. Give me strength. Keep me this time. Don’t let me fall away.” Those please faded as two weeks of faith merged into three, a month, two.

It was as if God was saying, Don’t worry, Rachel. Through me, you can persevere. You fear your sin – but I am here, with you. You’re free from that now. 

Now I hear Him in the same way. That quiet surety that this – all of this – was an answer to another prayer. You can witness to me. “See, I have placed before you an open door which no one can shut. I know that you have little strength, yet you have kept my word and have not denied my name.” -Revelation 3:8

I’ll post more later, I think, but for now – for now I rejoice. Truly rejoice, more than I had for keeping my life and safety, or even for the love that had been poured out to me. My God has heard my prayers, and he has answered them, unerringly, without doubt!

“If any of you lacks for wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” -James 1:5

“We want each of you to show this same diligence to the very end, in order to make your hope sure. We do not want you to become lazy, but to imitate those who through faith and patience inherit what has been promised.” –Hebrews 6:11-12

 

God let the car crash.

“read your blog… Not to be a downer but God also let the car crash.”

That was the message that popped up yesterday afternoon from an old high school friend I’ve recently reconnected with.

I’ll have to admit, I was surprised. By what I could tell from our interactions, he wasn’t (isn’t) saved – and I’ll ask him to correct me if I’m wrong. I can’t recall the last time someone approached me about my faith like that. But there it was, blinking on my phone just as I’d been about to lay down and get some rest.

God let the car crash yesterday.

I’m no stranger to bad things happening to good people. Not just a worldly good, either – Christian good, the kind of good that comes from trying to follow in the footsteps of Christ. The Bible is just as familiar with it, too.

One of the first people to spring into my mind was Job. Job was a righteous man in God’s sight – “blameless and upright; he feared God and shunned evil” (1:1). He was prosperous, with a large family, a large amount of animals, and a large amount of servants.

Then, one day, Satan came to God. God points out Job, and Satan points out that God has “put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has” (1:10).  Satan states grandly that Job will not be nearly so faithful when all Job has is taken away, and so God gives Satan the power to destroy everything Job has.

Satan leaves.

First, Job’s oxen and donkeys are stolen. Then his sheep are burned to a crisp, then his camels are stolen – then a house collapses on all his children, killing them. All catastrophes, one right after the other.

I want to stop here for a second. Can we just think about that? This man loses the source of his wealth and his children in one fell swoop. Because God handed over all that he had to the control of Satan, just to show how righteous Job was.

God wasn’t punishing Job. In fact, it was because of Job’s faithfulness that God put him to the test.

Those of you who know the story know what comes after. Job loses all of his children, tears his clothes in mourning, and says: “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised.” (1:21)

Philippians 4:4 says, “Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice!” Talk about taking that seriously, Job. I don’t have children yet, but I have a feeling that if I lost one of my children, I wouldn’t be anywhere near praising the Lord. Quite the opposite, most likely. Heck, I can’t even get through a bad sales day at work without asking God why He didn’t help me through like He did last month. (I’ve been working on that one…)

But here we have Job committing no sin in his reaction (1:22), instead praising the Lord. Satan, not to be thwarted, comes to God in the next chapter and tells Him that “a man will give all he has for his own life. But now stretch out your hand and strike his flesh and bones, and he will surely curse you to your face.” (2:4-5)

God gives Satan the go-ahead, saying Satan must only spare Job’s life. So Satan goes out and covers Job with sores. Job’s wife tells him to give up on God already, but instead, Job – who we know, from the rest of the book, would rather be dead at this point than continue living in his grief – tells her, “You are talking like a foolish woman. Shall we accept good from God, and not trouble?” (2:10)

I’m only in chapter 10 of the book right now; I don’t know how the rest of it will play out. But one very, very big theme is jumping out at me as I sit here with my Bible.

Job did not know what wrong he did in the sight of God to induce such punishment, but accepts God’s judgement, for who is a mere mortal to stand before the judgement of the Lord?

Job’s friends (at least the first two) believe that God punishes only the evil and saves the righteous.

We, as the readers, have a view Job and his friends did not have: why God did it all in the first place.

We know that all of this happened to Job, happened because God wanted to glorify his servant, to show Satan that no matter what happened, the faithful would not turn from God. As I type this, a dozen different ideas have begun to flood my mind, concepts of why Satan expected Job to turn from God and the kind of worshipers God wants and fosters.

But the big thing I want to highlight?

Job is a man of faith. His view on catastrophe is different from that of his friends. While his friends tell Job to repent, for he must have done some wrong, Job understands to some degree that, in the end, he cannot be right in God’s eyes.

“How then can I dispute with him? How can I find words to argue with him?” -Job 9:14

“The wisdom of the wise will perish, the intelligence of the intelligent will vanish.” -Isaiah 29:14, quoted in 1 Corinthians 1:19

What happened didn’t make sense to Job’s first two friends; it didn’t make sense to Job either. But, while his friends assume Job can plead his case before God, Job knows better. God’s wisdom is beyond our understanding.

So yes… God did let our car crash yesterday, my friend. I don’t know what lesson you expected me to learn from all of this, or what you thought I should understand.

I can only hope I expressed even a small fraction of this to you. “For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the freedom and glory of the children of God.” -Romans 8:20-21

We’re not made to have pleasant lives on earth, and sometimes it has nothing to do with how bad we are, but the fact that the earth is filled with sin. The very earth is full of sin.

But.

One very, very big but.

“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” -Romans 8:28

In that, I can and will hope, my dear friend. My God loves me, even though this world is full of the sin caused by the Fall. He will see me through, and I hope – someday – you will see Him too.

 

Edit: I have been told by another friend that the only verse I really needed to share here was Jeremiah 29:11. ‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’

While I agree that that single verse expresses the concept entirely – that while bad things might happen, God has everything set in place to our aid – I really don’t like the idea of ditching what I just spent two hours writing, so I’m leaving it as a footnote instead. You’re welcome, my dear. >.>

 

Edit no. 2, 7/16: The friend I originally wrote this about did not take kindly to this post. I decided to take it down last night, immediately after he messaged me, thinking it was better not to offend a friend over a single blog post.

I’m putting it back up, unedited. I’m surrounded by a Christian community, personally, and every person I have come to with this matter (sometimes in tears) has encouraged me to keep it up – spiritual warfare at its finest. So, anonymous friend… you know what my first reaction was and you know my sincerity in not wanting to offend you. But after a long, long time thinking – I think some things are worth offending over. You still have my friendship if you so want it.

What a day!

Hi guys! Sorry I’m already breaking my neatly-polished post rule, but today ended up being a crazier day than expected (and it’s only noon!).

Hubby and I were heading into work this morning – normally I drive in, since at this point I’m more used to waking up at 5 am – but he drove today. Weird schedules and me being dropped off instead of working like normal, etc.

Now, we’ve been married three years. And in those three years I’ve yelled some variant of “Slow down!” at him more times than I can count… he’s a guy who likes his thrills and thinks he can handle a car professionally! It’s always been in the Lord’s hands, not mine, but my husband’s driving has been a constant source of worry anyway.

My countdown for our first accident ended this morning, as you’ve probably guessed by my lead-in. I was praying while we drove (wrestling with a lot of issues regarding physical lusts versus serving the Lord) but broke off as we hit a particularly sharp series of downhill curves.

“Slow down!” I told him as we rocketed down the wet road. And then a moment later that awful rear wheel swing as we fishtailed – him turning too much in one direction, then even further in the other, trying to straighten the car – brakes failing – WHAM!

Everything happened so quickly that it took a moment to register we were in the other lane. We’d hit the guard rail, and between that and turning we managed to go from 45mph to 0 in a pretty small amount of space. Aching and stunned, I urged him out of the car and prompted him to call our car insurance agency while I pulled our front bumper out of the road.

The car was basically totalled. Hubby has since told me that the brakes failed and that, if we hadn’t hit the guard rail, the car probably would have rolled. As it was, we got a visit from someone from the fire department and the police department as we waited at the side of the road. One man stopped to make sure we were okay (considering it’s New York, that’s a big deal! Thank you, whoever you are).

It’s been six hours since. I’m happy to report that hubby is fine and the only injuries I suffered were a few bruises from the seatbelt.

More than that, though, I am simply in awe. Of how pain-free this was – because an accident was bound to happen sooner or later – that both of us are safe – that the damage wasn’t worse. I’m amazed at the prayers that have been poured out on our behalf. Awed doesn’t begin to explain the amount of love I have felt in these past few hours from all of my family (blood relatives and Christian family) and friends.

And what blows my mind is the simple fact that God loves me more than that. That every passage I have read this morning is a swelling testament to His love and grace and joy.

Consider it pure joy my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. -James 1:2-4

And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose. -Romans 8:28

I feel honored by the fact that I had the opportunity to make so many people smile today and that I was able to rejoice in the midst of all of this. I’m grateful that my strength and foundation is from Someone who is unshakable – that I can show that strength to my husband and point to where it comes from.

Today has been a good day! Can I hear a “Hallelujah”?